My Way or the Highway

They had to run out of gasoline, soon. I’d been on their tail for at least an hour. This desert road wasn’t ending anytime soon and at the high speeds we were flying, the dust was kicking up rapidly under our tires. Needless to say, I may need a new windshield after this. What’s that catchy tune? ‘Safelite repair, Safelite replace.’ I chuckled to myself.

The vehicle in front of us was a classic beauty, and I must admit I was a little jealous. A 1967 GT500 Shelby. Sleek black and practically gliding. I don’t know how they were making their gas last as long as it was - it was really quite astonishing. My 2015 Dodge Challenger SXT was keeping pace just fine. Yellow and damn near reflective under the desert sun, and I was perfectly content riding this Shelby into the ground. I knew eventually I’d outrun this pompous little fuck.

I had been minding my business, just cruising the road. I was taking my time, but my eventual destination was my cousin’s house in central Arizona. I myself lived in southern California. So anyway, as I said I was minding my business, and this Shelby comes out of nowhere, quiet as a bug. Not only does this fucker cut me off, but he clips the front end of my car! Right in the front passenger bumper. Of course I pull over, get out and insect the damage. I start screaming and cussing up a storm, my girlfriend is hushing me and telling me to calm down. There’s a dent larger than I expected, the yellow paint is long gone, replaced with black matte paint and scratches galore. I also notice a decent amount of blood, which catches me off guard. I wasn’t aware of anything that could have caused it.

I was resolved to my decision. I hopped back in my car and sped off in the only direction of the desert road. Which brings me here, tailing being this dirtbag in the Shelby. We’re pushing an hour and a half of this chase now. He must be getting nervous - he’s glanced in his rearview at me a few times, and looks more disheveled each time. My girlfriend is getting pissed - she’s even grabbed at the steering wheel a few times to get me to stop. 

My Challenger is keeping up like a champ. That Shelby is starting to groan, which means it must be running low. It’s starting to slow down. I slow down as well, but only in the slightest, to keep pace. Once it comes to a stop I plan on getting out of the car and beating this guy’s ass. Hit skip me and my prize winning racer? Fuck that - this loser is gunna pay.

As his car continues to slow, I realize that the groaning is sounding less like the groan of a car and more like the moan of a wounded animal and it’s growing louder by the second. Eventually the car stops moving. Ignoring the pleading of my girlfriend, I bolt from my car and head straight for this dickbag driver’s side door. 

I yank on the handle of the door and it is unlocked. I grab his shirt and drag him out of the car before giving him a good slug right across the face. He doesn’t put up much resistance against me. I lift up his slumping body and wrench back my fist to land another blow but before I can I feel him plucked out of my grasp by some force and thrust back into the driver seat. The door slams shut by something I cannot see. 

Suddenly the body of the car springs upwards, away from the wheels on the ground, which are slowly flattening and morphing into a bizarre footlike shape. I notice the back left bumper has a strange ripped fleshy texture, and is bleeding. It is in the same spot that would have hit my car. I frantically remember that there was blood on my car.

I look back to the man in the driver seat. He seems to be… enlarging. The top of the car is slowly retracting, even though it isn’t a convertible of any kind. As he places his hands on the steering wheel, his body starts to merge with the vehicle. The car doors open and become arms and hands, and his head intertwines with the hood of the vehicle. 

The transformation completes and this grotesque hybrid man car stands inches in front of me. He leans down, chuckling for a moment, centimeters away from my face and says, “Are you glad you caught up to me, bud?” before dripping oil on my face and opening his jaws wide to bite down on my shoulder...